Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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