But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
Ketchup is God's man juice
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
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