Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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