My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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