Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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