I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
