Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
