): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Randomize
