how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
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