Cold hands, warm shart.
WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Randomize
