So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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