Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Alive.
So much puke
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
