Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize