Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
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