3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Randomize