in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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