Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
oh god the rape fog is back!
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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