So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
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