Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
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