Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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