He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
