Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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