our cab driver is having phone sex.
honey bunches of taint.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
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