Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
