i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Randomize