Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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