i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Randomize
