Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
