i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
love makes seman taste better
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
