I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
How many fucks given?
0.12846
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
