Its about making memories worth repressing
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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