I puked a lego.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
