yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
