are you still at the devil's house?
nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Randomize
