hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
You were trust falling into bushes
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
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