"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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