i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
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I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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