Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
