so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
