cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
God, I missed his penis.
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