we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
tell me about the fingering
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