do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize