she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
