No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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