So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
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