Joe is yelling at the trees again.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
A bitchslap is in order.
Randomize
