there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
