So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
I'm both gender and math confused
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
