is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
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cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
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Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
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