Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
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