No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
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