He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
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She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
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I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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