I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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